There’s discrimination towards,race,sexuality. Which yes, are incredibly important, and should not be a thing, yet a discrimination, which I don’t think is talked about enough, is discrimination, towards people with two nationalities or more. These are people who are a different nationality, and live in a different country, or have been born in a country yet they’re whole family is from a different one. The discrimination, and the feeling of being a misfit.
And so I am writing this article, to share my story. My point of view, and my experience, with being two nationalities.
Background information
I was born here, in Ireland, Cork to be exact, my whole life so far I have lived in this country. Yet still, because of how I look, how I speak, how I do anything. I am treated as an outsider, someone who does not belong. Ireland is a welcoming country, though that doesn’t mean it still doesn’t discriminate. No not the whole country, but some people do.
The first time I realised, we were different
I have a very vivid memory of when I was around the age of 6, maybe 7. And my mom had been swinging me on a swing, there was a child running in front of me though, and my mom politely asked the woman to move the child. Not to mean, but for the children’s safety. The woman instead of just nodding and moving on with her day. Had started calling my mom slurs, telling her to go back to her old country. Yet all my mom did, was ask her to move her child for safety.
I was a child, yet that doesn’t mean I hadn’t understood,I had understood. Each sentence, and as much as my mom had wanted to act as if: Everything was fine, and she wasn’t hurt. I could see the sadness and hurt in her eyes, holding back tears, for me.
Nobody should be treated that way, nobody. Not a Polish person, not any person.
A side of me, from Poland
My whole family is from Poland, and they all speak it, as well as me with my parents at home. Yet when I visit Poland, it still doesn’t feel as home, as well as Ireland, everybody there, can tell by my accent. That I am not originally Polish. They ask where I am from, ask me to say stuff in English. They are not bad things, but they’re things that a regular Polish person wouldn’t asked. So again I have the feeling of a misfit, and I feel like that in Ireland too. As though I don’t belong. I do not understand somethings I Polish, nor know to spell some things. I struggle, people laugh, find it funny and amusing. I feel ashamed, and embarrassed.
The people in Poland look at my clothes, knowing they are clothes from a different country, they hear the way I speak. They know I’m different. And I feel so different then them all.
The other side of me, From Ireland
I go back ‘home’ to Ireland, and once again I do not feel at home. I don’t look like the people around me, I look European, as some people told me, Lithuanian or Ukrainian, or just Polish. I do not have an Irish accent, as I was not brought up in an Irish family. My skin tone, is different, I am tanned, the people here are pale. Not only do I feel as though I act different, I know I also look and speak different. I feel embarrassed when we are learning about Poland and the teacher asks who here is Polish. To put my hand up, as I already feel different, I don’t want to be looked at different.
They ask me things like “Irish must be such a hard language for you” because they assume. They already assume I have moved to Ireland ,not that I was born here. They don’t know that I understand the Irish language just as much as they do. But they assume, and I am too afraid to correct them.
I wish…
I wish a lot of the time, if I could just be one nationality, because I do not know who I am. I am Polish and Irish, but I am also not Polish nor Irish. I don’t belong in either places, countries, languages. Because no matter what country I will stay in, I will always feel different.
My parents say they want to move back, but I don’t want to. I don’t want to live here, nor do I want to live there. I want to move somewhere else, where I will feel at home. And not different. Sometimes, I have huge anger towards my parents, mad at them for moving to this country for their own profit not thinking of mine. But I know they also moved here for my sake, for my better education, for the english language. But they don’t understand, maybe they do or maybe they never will. How much I feel like a misfit, how different I feel from others.
Who I tend to be friends with the most
Irish people are nice, mostly like everyone they are nice and mean people. But I find myself being better friends with people like me. Who are more than one nationality. Who feel the same, who also know they are different. Because at least then we’ll be different together.
The Summary
I am one person, yet I feel like two. Two misfits, people say they wish to be not only one nationality. But they don’t know what they’re talking about. I want t be normal, I want to be either Polish and live there, or Irish and live here. But now, no matter where I live, I go, I will always be different.